It's Miller time

Myron appeared on the abysmal Dennis Miller radio show on 9 May 2007. After the exciting 30 second intro tune you are suddenly faced with two hours from an old codger rattling on about nothing. What does he have against the world?

Fittingly, Myron's qualification for being invited on the show was that Vanity Fair article which established his intellectual dishonesty.

It's amazing how people can so misrepresent the distinction between the present and the future. So if you have terminal cancer but you're still walking around having not died yet, these guys would say: "What's your problem? Even I can see it's not actually killed you."

The interview went:

Ebell: ...We have not seen weather catastrophes because of the warming, and I think it's very unlikely that we're going to see much of a negative impact in the future despite all the attempts to find, well this species is under threat, and that species will have to move north, and the sea levels are going to rise 20 feet. I think if you look at each one of these claims, you'll see that there isn't much to it.

Miller: ... I have noticed a particular increase in the headlines about global warming that are taking it out of amusement in my eyes and into "Hm, where have I heard that stuff before?"

A couple of examples. I see a guy now talking about how binge flying should be done away with, maybe vacations. I see another guy talking about too many children, have one less kid and lets indeed get to 6 and a half billion world population down under maybe 5 and a half, dangerously close. And then we've got the "Man is a virus"... I think this is getting a little too rabid for my tastes. What do you think?

Ebell: Well I think that the environmental movement is very frustrated that the global warming scare has been around since 1988. There was a big treaty signed in Rio in 1992, and then the Kyoto Protocol in 1997. They've spent billions of dollars promoting it and trying to scare the public, and so far they haven't got very far. It's kind of a religion. If you look at their emissions, the whole point of the Kyoto Treaty is to force us to use less energy and lower our emissions. They are actually going up in a higher rate in percentage terms than in the United States since Kyoto was negotiated. So even though they believe in it, they're not actually doing anything. The one country that would do something because when we pass a law it gets enforced. If the government doesn't enforce it, some private person can go into court and a judge will enforce it. So they haven't been able to pass a mandatory restriction on our energy use in this country, and so they're frustrated.

Miller: [The president of France] Sarchosy seems to be in on this. I found it funny that he had the absolute courage to even mention America in his acceptance speech. But then he mentioned it to say we had to get on board as far as global warming. I guess he takes it hyper seriously.

Ebell: It's hard to say. You know it's very difficult in Europe to be accepted in polite society if you don't at least say you are very worried about global warming. Of course, most people who are very worried about it aren't actually doing anything. They're still flying around. You know Al Gore flies around in a private jet all over the world. And that Tennessee public policy group revealed that his power bills are kind of out of line...

Miller: ... We're all supposed to pillory ourselves every day of the year because we are a virus. If we're all supposed to cut down on the amount of kids we have, and if we're all supposed to not take a vacation once a year, why don't we just let it burn out.

Laughter

Miller: Am I supposed to go through all this so I can like stay four feet from my house, never drive, never take a vacation, not even have any glorious children playing ball in the yard, and once a week like Rod Taylor in The Time Machine I'm summoned by some siren into some cathedral, and while we're in there they can take the chains on and whip our own backs because we're a virus. If that is in fact what will take to get the planet all cuddly again, why the hell do I want to be here, Myron?

Ebell: I think you've got it Dennis. I mean I think that there's a... If we're going to look at it, I think most of our economy is not very vulnerable to climate change. The people who are vulnerable are in poor villages in Africa, and they don't have much energy, so that's their problem.

Miller: Exactly. They're the ones who are forced to run a fan by peddling on a bike.

That's right. Have lots of kids. They're really going to thank you for the avoidable catastrophe that's going to cast a shadow across their lives.

The next guest was some from Jihad Watch blog where they make up stuff out of whole cloth. The story of the day was the Fort Dix attack plot where a pizza delivery man in New Jersey took his jihad videos to the store to get them converted to DVDs and found his group of friends subsequently infiltrated by an FBI agent posing as a terrorist who sold them guns and recorded them plotting to attack the nearby military base.

Rather than realizing just how stupid this was getting, Miller says:

There's two ways we can shoot the information you just told me. Granted, I don't believe they're the sharpest scimitars in the drawer. But I also think there is a lax attitude in this country... I think there's a general consensus in the terrorist community that if we're not completely sleeping, we're in some state of somnambulant behavior, and they felt they could take their videos down to the local tarintino kid and just ask them to transfer them onto video. That's the wrong message we're giving off.

The terrorists are coming! The terrorists are coming! Be very afraid! The terrorists are coming!

Oh, they look like the three stooges.

Don't be fooled. They're getting cocky because they know we aren't scared enough. Be very afraid! Wooo-ooo-oo!

Jihad-watch adds: "Law enforcement has been doing a great job. You have to credit them, because after 9/11 there has been nothing, and yet there have been many major plots that have been foiled."

His examples:

• The plot in Canada to blow up the Parliament building,


• There was the plot to blow up the Sears Tower - by a gang of pot-heads in Miami, one of who had visited Chicago, whose only source of income was an FBI agent posing as a Al-Aqaeda agent.


• The plot to blow up the Brooklyn Bridge - actually, it was a plot by a truck driver to cut through some cables with a blow-torch to bring the whole bridge down. It probably would have taken about a month, if it was at all possible.


• The plot to bring down ten planes over the United States. - actually 10 planes flying from England to America by people who didn't have passports using liquid explosives whose chemical properties do not exist.

Seems like this Mr Jihad Watch gets as much right about the situation as Myron Ebell does with global warming. That makes them perfect guests for the Dennis Miller show!

That's it, they're completely evil

In the future when Climate Change is as clear as the billion or more people dying in Africa and the destruction of a few more major cities, as well as the limited availability of your next meal, people will look back at the record and discover all the work Myron Ebell did throughout his professional life. They will want to take him out to the beach to bury him in the sand below the high water mark.

The Myron Ebell Climate used to think this was unfair, until witnessing the latest CEI excess, the ever heard of DDT resitance, you numb-skulls "Rachel was wrong" website. No. Clearly not. The word "resistance" occurs nowhere in these putrid pages with its shroud-waving of African children who have recently died of malaria. You see, it's the environmental movement's fault for putting the lives of bald eagles and hawks above that of poor children.

Many of the same Africans exposed to malaria also have AIDS, but any attempt at direct action to bring the accessibility of AIDS drugs to below the cost of a luxury sports car is called stealing. If the richest and most corrupt corporations in history decide to screw the rest of the world -- as they are programmed to do -- good for them!

The CEI are bumholes who don't recognize evolution, natural-selection, or the survival of the insects that DDT can't kill:

DDT-resistant mosquitoes were first detected in India in 1959, and they have increased so rapidly that when a local spray program is begun now, most mosquitoes become resistant in a matter of months rather than years.

DDT becomes ineffective so quickly now because DDT-resistant mosquitoes exist at low frequency in the global mosquito population and, when a local population is sprayed, a strong force of selection in favor of the resistant mosquitoes is immediately created. It is only a matter of time before the resistant mosquitoes take over.

Lacking a reproduction cycle of weeks or a brood number that can be counted in millions, higher life-forms such as birds go extinct before they evolve. Pretty quickly that's the only life form that DDT is actually killing.

The manufacturer naturally says otherwise. They get paid regardless of whether it's working. Meanwhile, you've begun spraying it on crops that have nothing to do with malaria in a action that is nearly as evil as misusing antibiotics for fattening pigs.

The CEI is happy with all of this fall-out, preferring as they do for Earth to become as dead as the planet Venus. There are no lessons learned that they don't seek to be unlearned if it happens to be inconvenient for profits.

Future sociologists may eventually prove that this whole free market theory might have worked -- where "worked" is defined as not laying waste to everything in less than a hundred years -- had it not been for the consistent chatter of premeditated corporate-funded lies. The most telling clue will be the fact that every political organization that vehemently promoted unfettered free market philosophy happened also to be deeply implicated in these lies.

This is a clear, unequivocal message to the future: Go get them. Show no mercy. They knew exactly what they were doing.