Saturday, November 20, 2004

Myron may freeze for promotion


Myron has been uncharacteristically tardy in producing his Cool Head Newsletter this month. It is, however, unlikely that this is because he fears the wider public reading it for laughs. More probable are the rumours that this campaigner against illegitimate government power and influence could be taking on a job in the new Bush Administration. This is a President who chooses his advisers like most businessmen choose prostitutes; they want someone to make them feel good and sexy. In which case, Myron is just the man to oil his special interests.

Meanwhile, in the real world, over which these men most regrettably have an influence, the concentration of Carbon Dioxide gas has leapt to the highest level in at least 420,000 years! On the basis of no evidence, Myron believes there's nothing to worry about. Consider the concentration of fat cars that burn lots of gas! Now that's worthy of serious concern.

So, he carries on with his dastardly task of proving, from the standpoint of an ignorant economist, that almost every the scientist and climate model in the world has got it completely wrong. Unfortunately, some of the scientists are coming to agree with him that the have it wrong too; they believe that their models are not extreme enough. They are too conservative. Scary, unexpected things are happening, like the slithering off of ice from the Antarctic Continent. This is likely to make a bigger mess than when your freezer blows a fuse and defrosts itself all over the kitchen.

But with Myron in the government, he's sure to sort something out. For a start, he's got a plan to stop all these biased NASA scientists from fabricating this irrelevant information. He'll get the budget reallocated towards building yet more nuclear missiles as well as the futile development of a non-functional Ballistic Missile Defence against exaggerated threats that DO NOT F***ING EXIST!!!.

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